I muse on uk lottery funded films (not safe for uk luvvies)

Im not dead yet but i can whine

Im not dead yet but i can whine

One day i looking through the films of the week in a newspaper* and deciding if anything was worth seeing via the television i noticed a film that never got a cinema release to my knowledge.

However the lottery players paid for it, and it had its usual contingent of arty types feeding from the free money. Perhaps cinema  don’t pay.

It was low budget on the whole but it appears to be based on something young adult famous but nobody seems to have been really enthusiastic about.

It was also on late one weekend, and so i used this (my blog) to watch at my convenience.

It was not very good perhaps too adult for young adult,  but it keeps the luuvies from whining.  I was more interested in the back story but hey it was not a film for apes.

Not sure if you class this employee training (make work), or spending other peoples money with there friends?

No money was transferred by me

No it was not a Ken Loach film.

*nothing to do with netflix if you read this blog

the ‘diet’

Professor when in the zoo told us apes a very funny story about his mate and the diet tv program she watched.  I will return to this topic in the future.

Nutrition science so fucked up that apparently burnt toast gets you cancer, chocolate in non fattening and by that logic smoking cigars must be good for you.

As a well known scientist myself i can recommend that cardboard boxes are VERY healthy if eaten raw – to avoid the toast problem do not warm them up.

One diet was a baby food diet which needs a lot of water apparently and other crank ‘methods’ which professor could not believe females would do.    Ironically to call professors mate fat is a bit of a lie but that’s the power of these professional psychological lairs at work.

are-you-serious-wtf-meme-baby-faceBut that’s female humans for you.

The mystery is that she fell asleep for the last twenty minutes so the results as to what kind of cardboard equals the best kind of gross weight loss are unknown both to Prof and her.

Humanity…

 

The newspaper purchase

loyalcardBananas left the zoo and visited a nearby library in the peoples republic of camdem.since nobody else had bought the newspaper back to the monkey house so i ended up in big chain of newsagents.

Having located the item i presented it and the method of payment to the human who fumbled about several times to get this thing paid.

This was complicated by some management decree that i also had to have a several other bits of waste paper of some offer that usually would be invalid.

Those extra bits of paper (receipted by the pos too) where rejected and then i returned to the zoo none the wiser as to what they where.

If i was paying that retailer to promote something (my blog) and did what i did then i would want my money back.

When the public library is a non starter even for me

I was reading this (guardian not here) so i thought i would entertain you all with a tale.

It started with me trying to sort a data table by geolocation [not that hard], which eventually after a bit of googling got me to python which is not a reptile but a language which i am not that too clued up on.

I like new (to me) stuff and while i might have used perl before i decided to see if there where any library books – after all  i doubt they would have any perl books

I look stuff up, there is one children’s book with a brief mention of it* within a book on robots contained within a population of several million humans.

So being the zoo has  internet i give on the public library and fiddle to create a basic script which fixes my problem of which i am happy with.

millsandboonI also requested that the library system get some updated subject books in another area recently (i had to visit in person) and eventually they came.  One (both not of my choice)  was ok the other was written by a crook however it beat the 2001 for dummies version that was obsolete.

Mills and Boon is there level.

So next time your wondering why people dont use the library it is because i and they don’t read mills and boon romance novels who the civil servants n charge  seem very willing to buy in bulk romance novels.

In another example i was looking for another technical book in a different langauge and found one copy of it.  Unfortunately the person who had it was not returning it, so once again i i hunted on the internet and found something to get me started . I would buy a book if i knew a good one to buy but i don’t know.

Karen Bradley ignorant fool

Karen Bradley ignorant fool

So next time some govenment person – meet Karen says they want a modern library remember that one childrens book about robots and an book kept by a keptomatic must mean there doing something right after all one person in a million plus demographic benefited.

*i imagine basic.

amazon.slow

clownbootBananas is not a fan of amazon (my blog), although they did put a rocket under the arse of libraries and bookshops for the betterment of all. However i decided i needed something (non book) and they had something that was a third of the price in retail shops.

So i had to remember my account and reset the password and buy the item. It needs batteries which the zoo does not have, i bought rechargeable ones which fit with the battery re-charging thing (free) whom came from somebody else a very long time ago when i replaced some dect phone batteries and did not need to use as the phones.charge the batteries.

Neither items came from a amazon warehouse . I may not have it ‘now’ but since i have been looking for months for a specific item and it can wait.

Since i don’t buy stuff from them regularly i am glad amazon exists but it appears amazon is not what it once was, any retailer complaining about them is out of touch.  This is not a compliant but an observation.

 

Our friends in the north

the northern beach

the northern beach

I was reading the other newspaper (which i don’t particularity respect) and things i had missed when a bbc (who the newspaper does not like either) radio drama called borderland was suggested as worth a hear. .

So one day i set my ears to receive left wing centrist bbc bias

Set in post brexit Britannia the immigrants – be they legal or illegal are leaving and while the playwright keeps it fresh with a dose of sports direct working conditions and the calais chaos (you tube) its grasp of devolution politics and peoples north of Watford , and wet ones in the west leaves much to be desired.

It is conveniently forgotten that labour brought in devolution of wales and scotland and neither are now strong labour voting areas.  As to northern Ireland well that’s been reunited with the south in this drama.

If you had not guessed it the scots and the welsh are also racists in this drama but since they did not vote red that must be true after all playwrights never lie,

Eventually our victim (female) gets to Ireland and lives happily ever after and this is where i get confused

spot the police

spot the police not the farmers

For four hundred the years protestants and catholics have had a deep mistrust of each other and as the bbc has reported in northern ireland that if you mix say muslim into that mix (bbc news) then i see a new threat to both not that i believe in the sky fairies

While it might be ‘drama’ why is it not wrong to paint locals as evil for pointing out the problems with an ever increasing population and less money spent on say libraries and health.

If the bbc wishes to paint all of ts white viewers as racist then good for it but by doing so they miss there point.  Not all of us live in Islington, and why does not immigration not mater to non women friendy ireland ?  (my blog)

If walking with a orange band is cause for the riot police to be out most nights  and segration of catholics from protestants is still common somehow to call the irish non problematic seems odd.

Anyhow what do i know. perhaps i should find a zoo in Islington

BBC ‘scotland’

bagpipeScotland is getting its own news channel at a cost of £30m a year, of which the rest of the UK will fund. – Craig Murray of which i link to on the right hand side has his witty take on this idea which sounds plausible (my blog).

If your into bagpipes (cpr for dead cats) and the cost of how much deep fried mars bars (my blog) cost then i suppose this is a great idea – cannie!.

It might need subtitles and pas78 stuff too

The bank that does not do a lot (co-op) or outsourcing

Flowers

Flowers

If you cast your mind back you may remember Rev end Paul Flowers, (my blog) his cocaine habit and the rent boy (s) and despite that was in charge of the co-op bank in the UK, despite its left wing bias* its still a bank which is quite an achievement..

If you can get your head around those facts, bankers ok to do drugs, but the priest in charge of a bank, is a good start – your position on the rent boy is something that may depend on where you live (my blog).

News (bbc) reaches the monkey house that the bank is once again is up for sale after another bank** could not sort out the problems so here is what surprised me was this – Quote

Separately, it says it has resolved a key contractual differences with Capita.

Western Mortgage Services, part of Capita, will continue to provide mortgage administration services and new mortgage application processing for the bank and its clients.

Anyhow while outsourcing is not new i am wondering what the staff at the co-op bank did all day it sounds like not much but as most of the problems reported stemmed from there purchase of a building society (not a bank) i guess living the high life means somebody else did the work and damm the numbers as the rent boy comes at 17:30..

A while back there was news story about a child criminal in the uk who got caught after a crime spree and the judge person asked what he wanted to do – his answer was a banker..

Unfortunately i cannot find the item (ret-conned) from the bbc but i do remember laughing at the brazen honesty of the lad from melton mowbray or some place that while crime did not pay banking did.

Bankers and banks come with a perceived image of maths when most of the work is office based.   When an outsourcer runs so much of a bank i wonder if the magic of banking is an illusion.   If i where so inclined it appears that setting up a bank is not as complex as it once was.

*It also trusted trade unions with massive overdrafts ** probably not there fault and this is a bank trying to doi the right thing opposed to say rbs (my blog).