film things

As seen on neflix [my blog] as most of these never appeared to make it to a cinema.


imdb:tt1389072 – an interesting film where humans get miniaturized and find the same problems [my blog – mini people short story] so as a solution to saving the world its thought provoking even if it goes nowhere.

4/5 bananas

John Wick 3  Parabellum

imdb: tt6146586 I liked John Wick [my blog], John Wick 2 [my blog]  so i am invested in this.   Please dont start here.

3/5 bananas – Stylish.


imdb: tt4693358 has been in a watch list for ages and i think i  had this confused about an american high school vr game thing which i started and then lost interest in.

This is australian and well done for a dystopia.

5/5 bananas.

Netflix is not a specific film channel and while some might whine about what holywood refuses to sell it lets take a look at some films that i saw on free tv

The great wall

stars matt damon [see above downsizing] and was something i watched most of in fast forward mode.

1/5 bananas

Assasins greed

A video game film and while technically challenging was incredibly boring.

I hope netflix never buy those films for distribution on netflix.

Hidden Figures

imdb tt4846340 is a natural for diversity television broadcasters to show.  Likeable if not heavily laid on at times.

4/5 bananas

Back to netflix for

Kursk the final mission

As seen on netflix through a professor recommendation.   Not a nice way to die with those oxygen candles but a Luc Besson film and thus worthy of a see

4/5 bananas

The alien ‘franchise’

Bananas recently had the opportunity to see alien covenant** on free tv.  While it is interesting to note netflix* do not appear to have bought it where we live for ‘distribution’.

So i scheduled the dvr [my blog] and one lazy day sat down to see what happened.

Essentially it was a remake of alien and personally i am glad netflix did not buy this shit.  If i where a film maker and was only allowed to make the same film over and over again i think i would rather not make any films.

*wise people **the one after promeathos [my blog].

film things

As usual not seen in a cinema – whether you deem a single 9am monday cinema schedule a release or not is of course subjective.

Professor Marston and the Wonder Women

imdb: tt6133130 is from 2017 and something that sounded interesting but not comic (my blog) book ‘comic’. If i am honest the creator and his muses are more interesting than the thing you know of.

5/5 bananas

the changeover

imdb: tt5699060 is a new zealand  ‘teen’ film with timothy spall (my blog) in. It does not give away the secret sauce and entertained me.

2/5 bananas


imdb: tt3722062 has been siting in my netflix list for years.  Iceland looks nice.

3/5 bananas – if snapchat was holllywood then this would be an award winner.

Shanghai Fortress

imdb: tt6628322 is a Chinese made film where china saves the world from aliens kind of. See this (my blog) instead.

Expect a huge number of military salutes

0/5 bananas.


The King

imdb: tt7984766 is an interesting sideways glance at Brexit, dossiers, (my blog) and henry the 5th – i have actually been to agincourt

Apparently there is somebody ‘famous’ in it – which i did not know.

5/5 bananas – worth a see


imdb:tt8254556 (my blog) deserves its own post (my blog).

That is enough of that for this post.  I am sure all the deeply uncommercial* but oscar worthy films will soon be dumped in cinemas and will be regarded as pretty much forgettable by most.

*no superheroes in them.





Is something i have seen in the west end theatre and liked once your in a frame of mind.  I made it to a cinema this year.

Its cinema release has been a mixed blessing – mind you the gulf between superhero films and cats a show is a chasm. While spiderman [my blog] is accepted cats is deemed abstract* – mind you if your going to see a film for a name seeing a hollywood a lister being a cat is not probably what you wanted to see and your not in kansas anymore.

So there is a disconnect between your average cinema visitor and the cats audience.

Cats apparently had sloppy effects in it, and was rushed when it was not ready that is the fault of hollywood not the idea from where it came from.

If that is a way hollywood think they can attract a new audience rather than comic book casual users then they have a few issues.

Cats as seen in a cinema has some less stellar cast especially in the singing talents/mixing and gets better once it is warmed up, certain songs are not covered from the original show but appended too it – most of the original songs work.

I could not see the faults the critics saw in the film.  If i was to nitpick the scale between the human world and the cats seemed needless exposition and provided  your willing to suspend disbelief then it works however if your going to see hollywood celebrity** then this is not your thing.

4/5 bananas

*not for islamic audiences – the iranian version might be interesting if ever they made one.  **I rather see things for what they are not if a man on the telly is in it.



diversity quotas in australian tv & film production.

Australia is not known for good tv** and films but recently a lot of there stuff on netflix has ethnic minorities in the unlisted seems to have a whole cast of indians being best hindu indian* in australia.

Indian grandmother in the unlisted seems to be in most of the scenes and despite its tech billionaire bad/create zombie message gives an odd perception.

Another example is an alien invasion film that also has a low budget and it also got me thinking is this really Australian.

Indians doing tv stuff (my blog) is something i am cool with but when there culture essentially over rides everything else i do wonder is australian stuff that toxic to film and tv luvies.

If i ever get through the series and the bad film noted i will link to this post.

*racist ? ** eg not soaps

gender identity and the mentally ill

girl (imdb: tt8254556) is a film i saw on netflix as a french cinema event ‘nod’ * and oscar foreign film shortlistee not that i have been in a cinema in years or see some tv show sack comedians for wrong think.

I watched it not for that but its handling of the debate that lesbians are exclusion-ist (terfs) and male gays are also the bad in the gay rainbow. Yaniv (my blog) is a good example of this where the rights of some gays are deemed bad.   Welcome to intersectional politics comrades – if you watch sargon then your in the know.

Girl takes the transgender thing to the extreme and neither the woke seemed to like it and the rest felt it wanting in other areas as to be expected from a brief look  at some comments.

I was left inferring a meaning and i think the transgendered boy became anorexic if i understood the meaning at the end and that femininity as presented as the ideal by the tranny was an unrealistic goal.

Somehow i also got the impression that the boy who wanted to be a girl did not like boys and would not be accepted as a female either way despite not being able to birth children if dreams come ‘true’.

As to be expected such a film did not get a wide cinema release, and got a netflix release which must have been really pissed off that cinema event who hate netflix how dare television show films.

As i am talking about a 0.000000000000000001% population perhaps this Belgian film was not supposed to be seen and by miring it in cinema distribution rules also suppressed it.

While there is some reflection of the war between the colours of the rainbow it is not particularity wise and it might well be seen as left wing propaganda which looks through innocent eyes and ignores the dangers that the doctors cant speak about** for being accused of being phobic.

2/5 bananas – that’s lottery money for you.

*they hate netflix for irony and this will not be on french tv for years **young people deemed transexual who then reject the diagnosis are also deemed traitors by the left.

Film notes

Seen not in a cinema, so dont expect to find them in one. Some of these have been sitting here to scheduled for years.

martianThe Martian

imdb: tt3659388 is a book i did not like and was seen on dvd, some of the writing was hard to see on a television but i liked this film despite its negative take.

2/5 bananas.

The Danish Girl

imdb:tt0810819 is this book (my blog) and enigmatic either for reasons for certificate or squeamishness.  It sets a few scenes and i think adds some new ones but does not deal with the divorce which was the first case where a male and female set a precedent.

Its a bit slow 1/5 bananas – read the book instead.


imdb: tt2582802.  I like J K Symonds from oz and portal 2 and it nice to see real music rather than autotune music.

5/5 bananas.

Blade runner 2049

imdb: tt1856101 er do not ask me where is the philip k dick (my blog) in this nostalgia fest and at least Harrison Ford can at least still act or phone it in while his younger clone who i last saw an netflix film about not aging is still unable to.

Plot wise there is a massive hole in the story and lets leave this here

1/5 bananas.

John Wick 2

imdb: tt4425200/ was not something i thought i see soon [2017] but chance gave  an option.  I liked the first (my blog) and while less interesting it is nice to see –  for the fans only.

3/5 bananas

Level 16

imdb: tt4006302 i saw on netflix and is an interesting take on beauty after all a barbie doll is for ever.

5/5 bananas.

Cannon films

do you mind

Cannon made films until they got sank by raising the titanic and ever since it is running joke here in the monkey house as to whether its due a sinking or not.

Cannon where a prolific maker of films which got a cinema release before cinemas found they only wanted blockbusters.

On netflix (my blog) they had a film called lifeforce (imdb:tt0089489) which has not aged well and stars Patrick Stewart it includes naked ladies who are supposed to be space vampires  where most of london dies before leaving.

The main attraction is the naked lady vampire and for the time it is a well made film with good effects.

Lifeforce is no top ten film but by existing tells that cinema owners clearly have changed.

2/5 bananas

film things, space yoga and film makers being snobby toward netflix and ‘streaming’

Usual disclaimers apply and very good luck finding these in a cinema.

A cure for wellness

imdb: tt4731136 is a modern take on dracula.   Quite slow but it ramps up and I think the good guys win.  It remembers the cardinal rule of horror of not to explain all.

4/5 bananas


is a french award winner imdb:  tt8359848 and implied drugs / sex and craziness.

Do not expect coherence here but has a certain charm as it has no super heroes in it

3/5 bananas.



imdb: tt0483607 dates from 2008 and is max max (my blog) done in scorland who features a Gordon Brown type (my blog)  who turns scotland into a land of zombies through iron bru*.

Quite why it took nine (9) years for me to even hear of this film yet alone see it is something to marvel at.

Its better made than than the remake i linked to  although most of the cast i have never heard of.

Its genuinely bonkers does not make a lot of sense and fun

1/5 bananas this is the optime of a film makers hate of netflix or

how dare you stream my awfull film which never got any release by my fellow art profesionals.


imdb: tt4443922 has a cast of about four people, and features space yoga.

Either they went crazy, got bored, or decided to make yoga an important part of the film.

Stylish but incomprehensible

2/5 bananas

*a sweet soft drink comprising mostly of sugar which the natives of scotland are upset at the maker of for reducing the sugar content because of fat people – never tried it.